The Palmar reflex: Why holding a pencil can be such hard work
Messy handwriting, aching hands, a mouth that moves while they write. Here’s what the Palmar reflex is, how it links the hands and mouth, and what you can do.
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By Adi and Dana Latter, Melillo Method certified practitioners · Updated 14 November 2026
Palmar reflex quick facts
- Also called
- The grasp reflex
- Appears
- Around 11 weeks in the womb
- Usually fades by
- Around 6 months after birth
- What it does
- Makes the fingers grip automatically when the palm is touched
What is the Palmar reflex?
Put your finger in a newborn’s palm and they grip it, hard. It’s one of the first things new parents notice. That grip is the Palmar reflex.
It’s automatic. The baby isn’t choosing to hold on, and they can’t easily let go. As the brain takes over control of the hands, the reflex fades and your baby learns to reach, grab, pass a toy from hand to hand and drop it on purpose.
There’s also an interesting link between the hands and the mouth. In young babies, pressing on the palms can make the mouth open. This is called the Babkin response. It’s one reason some practitioners connect hand skills and speech.
What it looks like in a baby
You’ll see the grip whenever something touches your baby’s palm. Over the first months, you’ll notice them start to open their hands more, reach for toys and let go without help. That’s the reflex settling.
Signs the Palmar reflex may still be active
Some practitioners, including us, see these patterns in children whose Palmar reflex hasn’t fully settled:
- A tight, awkward pencil grip, often pressing very hard
- Messy handwriting, and hands that ache or tire quickly
- The mouth or tongue moving while they write, draw or cut
- Struggles with buttons, zips, cutlery or scissors
- Avoids messy play, or dislikes things touching their palms
- Drops things, or finds it hard to judge how hard to grip
- Slow to finish written work at school
Why it can matter
When a grip is still partly automatic, every bit of handwriting takes extra effort. A child may know exactly what they want to write, but their hand gets tired long before their ideas run out. That can look like laziness or poor concentration, when really they’re working much harder than their classmates.
How we check for it and work with it
We look at how your child holds and releases objects, how their fingers move on their own, whether their mouth moves when they use their hands, and how they hold a pencil. We also look at their posture and shoulders, because a stable body helps the hands work well.
In the Melillo Method, hand skills don’t sit on their own. We look at the Palmar reflex as part of the whole picture, including posture, balance and how the two sides of the brain work together, so that handwriting has a stable base to build on.
New to the approach? Read our guide to the Melillo Method in the UK.
What you can do at home
Little and often works best. These fit easily into play.
Squeeze and release
Squeeze a soft ball or a lump of play dough as hard as possible, then open the hand fully and stretch the fingers wide. The letting go matters as much as the squeeze.
Finger by finger
Touch each fingertip to the thumb in turn, slowly, then back again. Make it a race with yourself once they get the hang of it.
Heavy hand work
Wheelbarrow walks, crawling, pushing against a wall and climbing all build strength and stability through the arms and hands.
A few minutes every day does more than a long session once a week. Consistency is what makes the difference.
Want a step by step plan?
Our free primitive reflexes course is a full course, not just an intro. It shows you how to work on primitive reflexes at home, step by step, with simple daily routines.
Start the free courseQuestions parents ask about the Palmar reflex
When should the Palmar reflex disappear?
Is a retained Palmar reflex linked to handwriting problems?
Why does my child’s mouth move when they write?
Can the Palmar reflex be integrated at home?
Is it linked to speech?
This page is general information for parents, written by Adi and Dana Latter, who are not medical doctors. It is not medical advice and does not replace your GP, health visitor, paediatrician or other health professional.
Ready to start?
Our free course is the easiest first step. If you’d rather talk it through, book a free 15 minute call with Adi or Dana and we’ll tell you honestly whether reflex work is worth trying for your child.
